I have tried for the past two months to come up with something worth posting on here.
A lot of it has been about some triumphs or discoveries I've made as I am approaching the celebration of my 3rd year of marriage. I have been reading as part of my devotions "Sacred Marriage: Celebrating Marriage as a Spiritual Discipline." by Gary Thomas. OUCH! I highly recommend this book but, not for those who do not understand what the term Spiritual Discipline means. Several reviews I read seemed to completely misunderstand the point the author was trying to make. It as opened my eyes to my bad attitudes and mindsets.
But, try as I may to come up with some cute or quirky little posting that will delight the eyes. I can't.
The things that I have been dealing with such as, unforgiveness, grief, guilt, self-evaluation, self-hatred, the continuing battle with depression, I am not entirely sure how much I want to divulge in the open for every one who wishes to read. Maybe some day I will divulge more. But for now, it's not necessary.
Maybe it all comes down to the fact I feel out of place the majority of the time, not sure I am needed, or wanted, and it is a battle I constantly fight: the battle to be less self-absorbed and to focus on others instead. Because honestly, there was too much about "self" in the paragraph above.
So. I am beginning little by little to pursue that mindset with, first of all, my husband. To thank him for the little things. To accept his love. To serve him. To look outside of myself more.
